Monday, April 4, 2011

In spite of diabetes

Contemplating the greatest thing I have done in spite of diabetes is something I am battling with. I consider the many great things achieved by the many great people in the DOC and I am quite frankly amazed and left in awe. So many amazing people, so many accomplishments... and personalities that seem to leap off my computer screen.

I have come to diabetes via a slightly different road. Initially misdiagnosed as a T2 and having spent a good while avoiding the issue by the time my diagnosis was corrected I was lying almost unconscious in ER with severe DKA and a raft of complications. In my twenties I was nearly blind in both eyes, with severe neuropathy and a range of other issues.

Survival….I admit it is not much of an achievement but my story has not yet ended….I write a new chapter each and every day. I wake with a spring in my step I never had. I open my once near blind eyes and take in the daylight. I hop in my car and go for a drive, I take a walk along the beach at sunset, I let the cold rain wash over me on a humid and sticky day. These are not achievements to hang my hat on. They are not things I plan on sharing with my kids should the time come but I look towards a better day.

For now the story goes on. I have found in the DOC a community of people I love and cherish. I am motivated like never before to preserve what is left in my failing body. Each and every day I “meet” and converse with amazing people doing great things. I drink in their wit on Twitter. I read their blog posts, I hear their voices and I grin, no...I laugh. I look at the person I was and who I now feel I am and can’t help but celebrate.

In all honesty I don’t know if my body will ever be close to what it should be but that is no longer an issue. I am not laying down, I am not surrendering and I am not giving in. I am standing my ground and I am going to move forward. Surrounded and supported by an amazing community the only way is up.

Mine is no fairytale story, you will not find it recorded in any leaflet lying around at your endocrinologists office but it goes on, one day at a time. The introduction and the early chapters have passed and the greatest thing I have done in spite of diabetes I do each and every day….I wake up and when the stresses and strains of daily life begin to flood my mind I look back. I look at the carnage, I look at the confusion, I look at the defeat and I see a new day dawning in all of its brilliance. I see the sunshine, I see the rain and I interact with the most incredible network of friends and support I could ever have dreamed for.

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